16/03/17 – I work out after hitting a speed bump and things feel significantly worse

I hit a speed bump. By speed bump I mean I had an awful case of reflux, then a rest day, then two depression days where I skipped working out and working in general.

I spent those three days of rest feeling guilty because I skipped exercise; depressed because I was depressed, ineffectual because I wasn’t working on anything else, and almost entirely sure that if I enjoyed even one day I would never work out again.

Luckily for my journey, my rest days were awful. Lineo compared it to my body holding me hostage. I’ve started this way of life and now my body expects some cardio or it will self destruct. I felt like I was decomposing on those days. It was unpleasant.

I resolved to work out today and dreaded it while I babysat my niece. Once my sister returned home and after the new Monsta X teaser dropped; I had no excuse to put it off.

I completed thirty minutes of total body toning, low impact, cardio and I felt like I was going to die.

Everyone who encouraged me to get back into exercising after my big failure told me to go hard with my reentry but I tried to commit to the form of the exercises and do my best without hurting myself.

It felt so bad to start exercising again. I was slightly cheered by the fact that could complete the workout and I haven’t lost all the progress I’ve made in the two and half weeks that I’ve been doing this.

Still, I feel ungainly. I still can’t do a full push-up but I can do a plank and a half push-up. There’s a metallic taste in my mouth after this thirty minutes.

I will not lie and say that it feels good to be stretched out, in my underwear and a towel, on the floor. It doesn’t feel any good but after these two days, I see there really isn’t an alternative.



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