25/02/17 – day four and I’m learning things about myself

My two day exercise hiccup gave me pause when it came to working out today. Logistical problems with my phone are sucking away my will to do anything but exist as a home slug.

Still, I put on my shoes, rolled out my sister’s yoga mat and completed Gym Routine 2 from my exercise program.

Doing this program made me think about how far I am willing to push myself for my goal of lasting fitness. I wondered whether I should press myself to my limits and work out into exhaustion and whether this would sabotage my long term goal. I thought that I should try but not to the extent of burning out.

This thought carried me through my workout but I fear it may have been a rationalisation for half-arseing burpees and push-ups.

Push-ups have always been my enemy. I am discovering how weak and clumsy I am through these sessions and it’s motivating me somewhat to become stronger and more graceful.

I want to be able to control my body and use my strength to do push-ups and pull-ups without being embarrassed and exhausted.

I’m so glad I’m not doing this challenge in a gym where my physical incompetence would be on display in real time to a live audience.

When I did (infrequently) attend a gym; I’d model on the stair machine and go home feeling like fraud. I’m grateful only my sister’s hounds have witnessed me gasping and falling heavily on the ground like a sack of rotten potatoes.

I felt like I didn’t give one hundred percent on my official work-out so I did a twenty minute dance choreography tutorial on Youtube afterwards.



I’m incredibly late in learning the choreography to Twice’s 2016 earworm  but I needed something saccharine to lift my spirits.

I always play and dance to TT when I’m drunk so I might as well learn it properly.

Hopefully learning some dance again will help me to feel as though my body is something I can master instead of a shapeless bag of pimply skin filled with acid and expired meat.

Thoughts on learning choreo: transitioning from floor work to standing positions is currently difficult. Whether this is due to weakness or laziness is unknown.

All I know is dropping it low feels like meeting someone I knew from high school: familiar but uncomfortable.

It’s late in the afternoon now and I can definitely feel that I have done some exercise. Muscles I am not accustomed to feeling are making their presence known.

I drank water today as well. That should cancel out the Krispy Kream donut I had with my breakfast of three pork sausages, right?



One thought on “25/02/17 – day four and I’m learning things about myself

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )


Connecting to %s